Holiday mom burnout
Holiday Mom Burnout is real…don’t ever try to convince yourself that it’s normal to be up at midnight writing a blog post on how it’s normal to feel this “not normal”. Gosh does that even make sense? I sit here sleep deprived and over worked and yet somehow it is my norm these days!
The last few days I have been struggling with keeping it all together. By the end of the day I feel more like a failure because the list of things I couldn’t get accomplished keeps growing. It grows right along side the to do list I have that gets larger by the day. Boy comes home with basketball picture order forms and the old version of me would have jumped directly onto the computer and proudly ordered a pic in each size plus a few keychains and magnets! For those moms out there that do just that…I bow to you with an inner envy I cannot deny! Meanwhile the pic order form sits collecting dust to my left under a mountain of paperwork i need to sort through, but I will get to that first thing in the morning…yeah right?!
As moms and women in general, in my naive old fashioned head it’s our job to make all the “homey stuff”…well, HOMEY! I strive on perfecting that lifestyle to my boys and step-kids (yes they are my stepchildren and to heck with anyone who dares to criticize me for calling them anything else. They have a mom who is prominently in their life and for me to call them mine sound disrespectful but that’s another blog post in itself so I will leave it at that for now). I cater to my home, God, my husband, my kids, my stepchildren, parents, friends, family and even a whole entire Facebook family! I am one of those people that have a hard time saying no and in doing so I find myself right here at the same time every year feeling that “mom burnout’.
I know I am not the only one on the planet doing the Christmas shopping, the laundry, cleaning, cooking, wrapping presents, decorating and the list goes on and on! I know y’all know what the heck I am talking about! For the moms that work a full time career outside of the home to the ones that make their living inside the home I am here to tell you I applaud you! I hear you praying at night for the strength to get up and do it all again tomorrow whether it be jumping on an airplane for a meeting somewhere across the country or a zoom from the comfort of your soundproofed home office while in the next room your toddler blares Barney from the TV or for you moms gettin up early to head to your 9-5 somewhere sitting inside a cubicle all day….from nurses to teachers to lawyers and homemakers and every mom in between I applaud you!
No matter what we do during the day our job at home is always the same…..it doesn’t matter if we have a husband that can decorate better than the Crafty Brother we are still the glue and the mom that holds our household together! Imagine if we all went on strike and stopped doing what we do!?!? I for one know my home would fall apart at the seams and so would my laundry room and my kitchen sink!
But….the burnout is real and typically around this time of year is when I feel it roaring it’s ugly head! It makes me feel sad, crabby and sometimes completely invisible! I don’t think the people we share our lives with on the daily go out of their way to make us feel like we aren’t seen but it happens! Do they really think the house just decorated itself, or those presents sitting piled in my bedroom will magically wrap themselves? Yet when the milk has suddenly vanished and this mom didn’t have one in waiting or the olive oil is gone with no back up in stock I see the looks and the mind twirls that say “what does she do all day”. Yes, it’s a simple oversight and one I rectify quickly but sometimes just sometimes it would be nice to be acknowledged for all the things we do get done, instead of all the things that lack! As moms in all forms we hold it together but we are still human and brain fog is a real thing (especially if your my age and menopause is right around the corner). With a list or not some things get forgotten or just put on the back burner! You know “I will do that in 5 minutes” and then 5 hours later goes by and it still isn’t done! We don’t forget on purpose and with a list or not there are 5 thousand other things that come in between that we didn’t plan for that take priority! I like to think my family lacks for nothing (well sometimes milk and olive oil:) yet I lay in bed awake each night and wonder if I have done enough? Do they even know how much I care? Would they miss me if I was gone? These things aimlessly fill my head when I should be sleeping and as always that “to do” list of mine gets a little longer the longer I stay awake in the wee hours overthinking every single thing I forgot to do or just plain didn’t have time to do!
Our jobs are never done….when 5 o’ clock rolls around we don’t punch a time card and call it a day! We are the first to open our eyes and the last to close them and I wouldn’t honestly have it any other way but sometimes the sense of pride I feel at what I have done gets a little lost amongst the holiday frenzy. As much as I love the Christmas season it does bring forth ALOT more “to do’s” on an already long to do list! It’s why I sit here at midnight and write this post and vent to other amazing women who know exactly what I am talking about and I want to let other moms and homemakers know that I see you, I feel you and I applaud you! So the next time someone looks at you like you grew 3 heads because there is no eggs in the fridge and you just were at the grocery store…stop and adjust that invisible crown thats perched a little precariously on the top of your head and know that I and lots of others are quietly and silently right there with you!! So just smile at them, and then go eat some bonbons!! Heck, it’s what we do all day anyway, right?